Hamburg Class - Male/Female Relationships

January 23, 1990
Hamburg, Germany

(A student translates YogiYogi One who has attained a state of yoga (union) where polarities are mastered and transcended. One who practices the disciplines of yoga and has attained self-mastery. JiJi Soul; used as an endearment or sign of respect. 's lecture)

Fateh! My idea is that, this is my tragedy. Twenty years ago I came in United States and I started studying the western world as it is and I found out the women is very naive, she just give herself up for nothing, I mean there is no basic commitment and illusion. Her basic commitment, 'I love, you love me, puch, puch, puch this and the whole thing' but the psychological nucleus of which the women, please come in, close your eyes.

Student: (----)

YB: (?). Very good, very good. My, my, my most painful thing which I have realized. There is no more crazy animal on the planet, but a woman. It is not that they are not wise. What I have found is that, they always know where the relationship will be, there is not a, I must have counsel about ten million people. And every woman knew where the relationship will lead to. But still they are blinding themself. It's amazing. Not that it is ordinary woman, I have seen women who are very competent, capable, highly in government, highly in business. Even I have seen, investigated women very high prostitutes, just to, just to figure out what is wrong. The only thing I have found wrong with the woman. "Maybe it will workout." Well it may, workout or not workout. There is no such thing as maybe in woman's life. Because once the penis gets in.

(Students laugh)

Then the (?). You have to take (?) it is a very medical, medical situation. Once it gets in. And it's space. And that spermatozoa catches the egg. Female has to live rest of her life with it. Man has not. This fundamental difference woman has to honor. But they don't. Answer me, why? Open for discussion yet. I am sixty-one year old. If I have said to anybody of... Doesn't matter what happen to me. I have stood with it. At the cost of disgrace, pain, betrayal, tragedy, lie, doesn't matter what. People ask me, "Why?" I say, "I said, it. It was wrong, it was blinding, it was terrible, it was miserable, it was beautiful doesn't matter. But the fact is, I said it. There's no way out. Because, world is dying. Maybe I was innocent, naive. Maybe it was spontaneous. But I said it. And that is human." Why you cannot be so. And why there is so much, may be in your life. Yeah.

Student: (----)

YB: No, no.

Can you not tell a man, this won't go in until there is a guarantee. You are, you are. You all know your hate. But when it comes to acting, you don't act, I want to know why. Knowing the man is a hunter. No, you must understand, no man is born to be a man. He has born with the faculties being hunter. Because he got the penis, seven months in the womb of the mother. And he lost the right side of the brain. That you all must know. So his faculty is, it is his basic faculty to hunt a woman. You have to, you have to come out with this façade of love. It's his hunting facade. That every, every woman, everybody of you knows it. And still you give in why?

Student: Because we believed that...

YB: Believe what?

(Students laugh)

You can't, you can't, you, you, you know it, you can't. I am yet to meet one woman, I mean I have played the game, I know it, it's a game and people play with me even, but I know, I know you all know it's a game. Yes that is you must understand I do not, I will not get pregnant, doesn't matter what they do to me.

(Students laugh)

And I will not bear a child. How come, how come you are equal with me there is no way. You are more responsible, you have to carry more responsibility, so you must be wiser. And God made woman sixteen times more wiser than a man. A female has a intuition, man doesn't, man has to become a YogiYogi One who has attained a state of yoga (union) where polarities are mastered and transcended. One who practices the disciplines of yoga and has attained self-mastery. , work himself to be intuitive. But they are hunters, and do you know that no man loves a woman, do you know that, do you know that, a man cannot love a woman, do you know that? Yeah, well he can't, there is a physical situation they can't love a woman. All they love is how much passion a man can get and how much pituitary to make his penis hard, that's all it is. That is why they are into maintenance, they are not into expansion or exploring and, that's why it is very boring for a woman after a while marriage or man doesn't mean anything, because he cannot go beyond, he knows he can get in that's all right and then he is just maintaining it.

Do you understand that, he said, no there you go, he said, no, that is what I am asking the women, twenty years I have started this, asking women to be grace of God, asking women to be strong, I have spent twenty years of my life. it doesn't matter how beautiful you are or how rich you are, if you do not develop a standard of grace, uncompromised standard of grace you will be exploited and then you will be hurt, then you will be angry, then you will pass on that anger to children, is on and on, see how much I know a woman.

Because once the hook is in the mouth of the fish, he is out and the bait is love (?),

Student: (-----)

YB: Come on, come on, I will give you (?), come in.

(Students laugh)

Wait, wait, sit down here. You have met me. You want to know whether I am a Goodman or bad man or lover or a bad lover or whether I am honest or dishonest. You want me very badly. You want real relationship.

(Students laugh)

Now, use your intuition and you can in three question know what sort of man I am, three question only it takes. Ask me those three questions, yo, yo, yo, yo, only you have three questions that's it.

(Students laugh)

A woman has only three questions if she cannot find out the man in three questions, she can never find it out. Come on.

Student: (----)

YB: No, no, no, absolutely wrong question. First is shake hand with the man, shake hand if in that hand he is polite, gentle and forwards himself, that, that is one, otherwise men never go you mind it. Shake hand with me, shake hand with me, shake hands, see, see the touch, you know, you don't need to ask a question, after this shake hand, you know if otherwise I say, (?).

(Students laugh)

All I say, you are just like little, no, if I, if I hide something, I will shake, not pull or I will overpower, I will over shake. One, second. Second is that I will, I will lay it out straight, my strength, without hiding anything. Absolutely no eye and thirdly the saddest thing, I will never listen to you and never will agree with you. Because I will carry you. These are the three tests, if a man comes through, he is a man, otherwise you are hiring a donkey and that's all. Man of virtue, man of virtue knows that he is to carry a woman. It is ingrained in him, he has to hunt and he has carry the hunt, therefore there is no agreement. He will never say yes to your anything, doesn't matter what you do, all he has to say, 'I know, you shut up, I'll take care of it' and he will, if that, that guts are not there, man will say, 'no, no please let us talk, please,' moment he says please.

(Students laugh)

Man will never, never convince you, he will never agree with you, he will never be very polished and pleasing, because he has to carry you, it's a very simple, honest evidence. It doesn't matter he is poor, or he is weak or he is young, it doesn't matter anything. Once a woman becomes his fate, he shall carry you doesn't matter what and first thing is he shall never agree. You will never find him in agreement with you for, this man who does puch, puch, puch I love you and yeyeyayeyeya and he is all over you or maybe, they are not men.

Student: Does a man need lot of courage to carry a lady?

YB: No, no, no, it is very, man is, that is the, his basic instinct as a man.

(Students laugh)

Student: Once known does a man know when it is like this, you know, at what moment does the man know, that is the woman of my fate, that, that is she.

YB: No, it is a cross, first cross of the eyes. Man, man of courage will say, "I love you, you love me?" And she said, no or she say, yes. His deal will be straight, he will deal very straight, man of, very powerful, very courageous, very straight, no, no game, because today he plays a game, tomorrow he plays game to leave you.

Student: (?) are having problems with their husbands because they are doing yoga, they are developing themselves, they are becoming more conscious, what is going on (?) so the question here is...

YB: What is wrong?

Student: Okay,

YB: Wrong is...

Student: (----)

YB: It's a very simple thing, a relationship, which has fear, which has game to play is established, it's not relationship. You get marry out of insecurity, you get married out of your young and you want a man, you got married because should say puch, puch, puch business, you know, you didn't get married and you didn't fall in love that you had a man. So, if now you got a man, make him a man.

(Students laugh)

Take the skin out and say, 'this is the man and this is the man, you want me or you don't want me,' that is, that is reality.

Student: (----)

YB: Yeah, very politely, very smilingly and very straightforwardly. I tell you my own example. I have a wife. She is about fifty-five and I am sixty-one and three, four years I got sick, I have about twelve members of the staff, about five, six, seven staff members are not married, they are single and they are ladies. So I and my wife decided that these people have served us, whether they think I am a man or they think I am a father or they think I am their spiritual teacher, but they have a dedicated life. Majority of the property I gave it to the religion, which mean I gave it to these ladies who are working, they will be officers, but there is certain amount, which is called family problem.

So what I and my wife did, we made half of the property to go to my blood children and half of the property go to these my spiritual children. The Attorney who was writing my estate will did not agree, she flew into see what kind of man I am, I mean I am real. I told her, 'if am giving one, fifty percent to my blood children, these are my blood children too, these are my spiritual children, what's the difference.' She said, "We do not know how to write it, nobody does it." I said, "I'll do it. I don't want after my death, these people who work for me should be on the road." I also made a proclamation that if I (?), he cannot fire a member of my staff till alive. If he chooses to do so, he shall be removed as Siri Sing Sahib despite his best ability, period. All he has the power to add one his personal secretary that's it. Because I feel honestly if I can work with my structure, he must be intelligent enough to work with that structure, if he cannot, he doesn't deserve that chair, that's a straight honesty, no nonsense about it, simple, solid statement of fact. No puch, puch, puch business.

Puch, puch is buttering and making it to look good when it is not. Stimulating to make you blind. Man will never blind his woman, why man needs a woman? Not for intercourse, not for children, for nothing, only for one thing. When he put his head on a pillow he can talk to somebody honestly and share. Otherwise I am yet to see a man honest enough, to be real enough, no I am a man myself. I had to become a YogiYogi One who has attained a state of yoga (union) where polarities are mastered and transcended. One who practices the disciplines of yoga and has attained self-mastery. to become a man, I don't know, I know men and I know their weakness.

Student: But also (?) encourage to search for other kind of man.

YB: Lady has to courage to search for a man, not other man, this man, that man.

Student: She is afraid to be near to somebody. She is afraid of nearness, of closeness

YB: You know, why closeness, investigate it. Neither be loving, nor be afraid, find out the facts, nobody is going to give you nine pounds of weight and not carry it rest of the life with you.

Student: (----)

YB: True, so don't say you need a man, you need a sex. Sex.

(Students laugh)

Then you are not looking for a man, you are looking for a sex and go to a sex shop, at Hamburg airport there is a sex shop. No I, I mean (?) do you know in Frankfurt airport there's a sex shop, on the airport, too much for me. So what I am asking is that, make a profile that you must know that profile if fits in then there's a man is worth talking about. Don't find a man because of loneliness, don't want a man because of company, don't find a man because of sex, don't find a man with a good looks and a good hooks, find a man which is a man. It is my experience that ninety-nine percent women knows what man is and every woman can find ninety-nine percent a man, but they don't try honestly, if a woman challenges man to a man, ninety percent of men will come through to be man, I experimented it, I had a student who was very playboy and he told me that the (?) has become a student, he doesn't want to marry and he has got forty, fifty girlfriends, why should he get married, and when you can get a bottle milk, why should have cows and cows dung and all that stuff (?) yeah finally (?) family, children, bah, bah, bah.

So he gave me a standard, yeah, a standard that, if a woman or he is willing to marry a woman, he brought his one girlfriend. If she is better than this then he will marry. Okay. So finally I found a person, I told him, 'get ready to get married.' He looked at her and said, 'yeah she is pretty,' he talked to (?), 'yeah she is wise,' he say, 'I do not know whether I will be faithful or not.' I said, 'I don't want you to be faithful, I just wanted to marry you.' She told what kind of man you are. If she can control it, it's fine, if she not it's okay. Today the position is he runs home, he runs home really (?) she is very elegant, she is so elegant that I have seen him, wherever he is, if he find something elegant in a woman, he runs home. One day he was going with me and we saw a very beautiful woman, very gracious, very gracious and I said, 'Oh, oh,' because I knew afterwards I will be alone and he is going to run home and in ten minutes he said, 'oh God I have to go home sir,' I said, 'don't mind you go (?).' I mean he cannot stand the sight, he want to go home and see she is there.

Once a woman is elegant and excellently elegant man has no choice and it's a standard criteria, it is a standard criteria there are no two opinions about it.

Student: What is elegance?

YB: Siri SimranSimran A deep meditative process in which the naam of the Infinite is remembered and dwelled in without conscious effort. where is she? Ask her to give those ten (?) when she got married, she was a little girl of mine, I had no reason to marry her, but I was very sick, possibility was that I may die and she was my direct responsibility as a child, I am not her real father, but I am her legal father. When her mother was pregnant, her father ran away and she made me as legal father and I have raised her, there she is and when she got married I told her ten things to live about, and I'll like you to hear that and she keeps in the purse, so she may never forget and she is twenty year old, isn't that?

Student: Twenty-one.

YB: Twenty-one now. When you got married how old you were? Eighteen. And this is what I told her.

(Student reads those ten points)

YB: Trust all for nothing, be trusting, but expect nothing. Do you understand? No, no, your excellence, your elegance and your grace, three things man will always challenge, if he challenges it, son of a bitch is out, he is not worth to be a man. Because then he doesn't need a woman, he needs a prostitute, he need somebody to put down, he need somebody to lay his number on and he, then he needs a woman, it is not a woman he is dealing he is dealing with some, some (?). It is not easy to live because then you cannot trust.

Student: (----)

YB: Call it anything, then you know when a woman has to hassle his life her life, do you know what I mean? Game is already over

Side B

Let her drag the insecurity. He won't. He will protect her physically, socially, biologically, psychologically, financially and futuristically. It is his inborn nature. If he is in love, he will be blind and he will do the thing. You know doesn't matter who says my relationship with Bibiji (?) what? But when it comes to action, I am always there and she is PhD in psychology and blah, blah, blah and she gets insecure sometimes very heavily, I said, 'what, what,' she says, 'listen to me,' I say, 'what, what I have to listen, you are saying, you are insecure right, I am saying don't worry, what is there to listen, what's your problem, what is there to listen, why should I listen to a insecurity, then I have to either confirm it or reject it, I am not willing to listen and I object it anyway, if the security will cross me then we'll see, so long it is your insecurity live with it, when it will become my insecurity then I will seriously look at it, and I shall and I will.' Not only I will carry her when I am alive, I will carry her to my graveyard.

Student: And to the graveyard.

YB: That's what it is.

Student: Education, so that they will not be, these insecure man.

YB: You should get those profile. We have profile, A, B, C, D, E, F profiles, these people need those profile, profile of a marriage, profile of a man, profile of a husband, profile of a officer, people needs lot of profile, we have laid it all up.

Student: Okay sir.

YB: Every mother should read those women in training. Man is discussed so thoroughly in it. They can totally understand what kind of man they needed tomorrow. It is their beauty to build a man of tomorrow, through their children, so some other woman may not suffer.

Students: (----)

YB: It is same principle those ten volumes can really do a job. It is ten years of honest discussion, give each volume to each women to translate it (?) this German. That's what they need, they need that.

Student: Every kid is getting older. The project can take too long, the children need it now.

YB: Basically, majority of the people do not know what is what? That's where the problem starts. We want to start everything with emotion and emotion get (?) by emotion you can just do a patchwork it's not standard, especially in Germany, when people have gone through World War II.

Student: It is a special situation that during the war the men went away. The women took care of the house, they took care of the businesses, they took care of the government, they took care of everything. They were in control on their (?) things. The man was out in venturing, it was difficult but he had training, he had travel, when they came back together it was very hard, the women were telling it's so hard with the family then to get back together, the women had control then she had to subordinate herself to this man who was nothing, who had lost the war, who is not secure and she had to then try to figure it out how to make the relationship.

YB: No women should forget, that in every man, there is still a baby and there is still a very, very, old, old man, it doesn't matter what the age is, and no man is beyond that concept, you forget that it's a tragedy, a woman will go with a passion and then later on will become very insecure or extremely secure, she becomes motherly, she will be dominant and very secure or she will be very, very insecure and very fake both conditions are not good, she has to remain a woman throughout the time. You are a woman in the beginning and you are a woman now, and you always will be woman. Never try to be a girl or to be a mother both are not (?) you married as a woman, you became woman first and then mother, you became a girl to become a woman and God made you a woman, your value is in to be a woman and then dominate the man. In a living room she is the most graceful and in kitchen no shelf can be... So you can reach a man through (?), through stomach and through your elegance and elegance comes through the mouth, through the word, what you speak and that's very important.

Once a man knows his woman is very elegant neither he will cross her nor he will double-cross her, cross or double-cross, why (?).

Student: (----)

YB: Not let her down, neither let her down, nor put her down. Even now corrupt men I have seen they don't do it, even criminals don't do it. They are so proud of a elegant, man is proud of a elegant woman, playing game of a woman is more dangerous to her than to a man. Look you take the knife and take the lemon whether you put the knife right way or left way, lemon is going to cut, not the knife. In the game woman is going to get hurt, not man, rather some men play the game to hurt the woman, because it is their vendetta against the mother and vice-versa

Everybody wants a secure woman but not a insecure mother in a woman and men who play game and woman arouse him to play a game, a woman digs her own grave. Some men will try to make a baby out of a woman, some men will try to make mother out of woman. Woman should be a woman, doesn't matter what, because man has married a woman not a mother, not a girl, nothing, woman is a woman. He didn't marry a mother so please understand whatever games a man plays woman has to understand that there is no play game for her. They normally play games to change a woman from woman to something else, don't allow it, beginning is wrong forget about the end, end will be wrong anyway, man will say, 'give me an opinion,' if you don't he will be mad, if you give him, he will fix the responsibility on you so what is the idea, man by nature can (?) they know intuitively what to do, but they also know how to play the game. They will always catch you on a weaker moment, these are the tricks they use, they care for you, they love you, but you will find in the care and love there is nothing but commotionalism there is no realism and they will use you to create that commotionalism.

Moment you allow it you will loose your personality and then they do anything they want, don't let them start wrong, normally men tell you they care too much, they love you too much, they do too much, actually, actually they cover their guilt, a man can't do too much, so why to pretend too much, but you are blind, you believe him. Then son of a bitch start doing too much there is something too much wrong and quickly figure it out what is this too much for, what is behind the screen. Once one guy told me, her husband has come from Japan. He brought a beautiful pearl necklace and this and that I said, but ever he buy jewelry to you, she said, 'no. I always go with him and he say buy whatever you want and he pays the check and this is first time he brought all these gifts, I said, oh, oh (?).' So one day we were sitting together, and I have been to Japan too, I was taken to this place to see geisha girl, 'did your host took you to,' he said, 'yeah it was a formality I had to do.' I said, 'tell her the detail of it.' So we got the cat out of the bag in two minutes.

She contains the he. Woman contains the man and female contains the male, that is the way it is. Man needs to be contained, that is a law. If you can't contain him you can't blame them. Men has no boundary they say they have, not true.

Student: (-----)

YB: In the modern society, it takes now two people to keep the household going, but man will not let the protection go, you will be surprised to find men do that. Suppose you are stuck at your work, late night, and you leave a message 'I am stuck at work.' A man will be right there outside to pick you up, doesn't matter how many miles he has to drive again, they don't give up grace normally and they don't tolerate disgrace either. Man will immediately know that his woman is not into him. He will start giving warning, and start fighting, and if he doesn't get the right answer, right or wrong he will walk away doesn't matter what.

Men are very shallow and they act very fast (?) you talk to men I do not know why, men always know woman do not make sense to a man, that maybe your satisfaction. Men know (?) when it comes to a woman, that man loves, world do not mean anything men only talk where they have to hunt, remember word of a man is the most dangerous thing it is just to invoke you and to mesmerize you, invoke and mesmerize, if you really see the love of a man it is rolling technique they will know you'll do them..., roll, roll, attract you towards them...,he has to carry, why he should roll, what's the idea, he wants you to come on your own strength, something serious.

Student: (-----)

(Students laugh)

YB: I know the story. I think we can talk it privately it will be much better, because I know the whole game (?) you must know your identity first and the personality, if you have already established then you know the strength, you are trying to know the situation to be emotional then there is something falsehood somewhere, and it will show up, and you know that. Life has a certain weight and it needs a certain strength to carry the weight and if you do not develop that weight and do not develop that personality there is a imbalance. That's why for a woman to be emotional and for a man to be commotional is walking towards the disaster.

The very word to say that man is very, very special, it's a deadly wrong concept, what is special he has two penises, four testicles, son of a bitch is a man to begin with and man in the end, why, why you are so blind and idiot. Find a man, not a special man, not special man, it's so ridiculous, it's so blinding statement an idiot will not do it, then find a special man and suffer special consequences, he never bought a special woman, she is not worth a dime. Special woman will create special problem, he will cerate special disaster, who wants special problem and special disaster, special consequences, not possible. One of these, one of the person my child I raised her, I educated her and I want her to be a woman, and it was a psychiatric problem she thought, I am very interested in her the very fact I took a special care, situation was so bad and she was so abused it took a lot to make a woman out of her.

(Students laugh)

When we were in Moscow, we were staying in Hotel Continental. In the reception it was about ten story high, there was a tower, it was like a globe, around it there were very musical people as statues on the top was the Rooster, when it is clock time one, two, three, four, our time before that the Rooster will open its wings (?) and then its neck go out and he does this what (?) and he will do it twice, twice he will (?) and the clock will strike one, two, three, four, whatever the time is, underneath there were three windows or four windows which will open up and a theme with drama will start circulating it was fantastic, but sound was no different (?). The idea is be a woman and you will find a man. Woman is a very precious thing. She is the future of the society, she is the base of the society and she is the beginning of the society, minus woman what is there in the world, tell me. But the tragedy with a woman is, 'he is my special man and love' and all that.

Simple things are simple thing, don't make them complicated and complex. Otherwise sequence leads to consequences. Special men create special trouble and special women suffers special program, better to be straight, simple and do it with a smile. Three things you must not do and three things you must do. Be straight simple and do it with a smile, don't be lazy and don't be lousy and don't be late. This is the problem with the woman, they always like to be late, they always like to be lousy and they will love and pretend to be lazy. These are three things a woman does normally just to charm herself and net result is that is where the trouble starts. Simple fact of life is woman has to carry the future of the manhood therefore God made her sixteen times more intelligent, to be sixteen times more careful, make a choice.

When you stand before a mirror, there is one advice I want to give you all. When you stand before a mirror don't look into the mirror whether you are very beautiful or sexy. Look into the mirror whether you are elegant and graceful, you can win the world, simple.

A woman who is elegant and graceful have two hundred men falling in love with her and she doesn't have to worry.

Student: (----)

YB: If a woman doesn't know who is who then God doesn't what is what, that is a biggest lie a woman does it to get herself screwed up and that is a whore in a woman to let her grace fall, let her God's fall, and let her get exploited, that's one of the saddest thing of the man. There is not a one woman who doesn't know where the danger is or where the strength is, she is not born,

"Bij mantarAntar , Bantar , Jantar , Mantar , Tantar , Patantar , Sotantar These describe the sequence of creative expression from inner essence to full manifestation. Antar is the inner essence and being. It is before form. Each essence has an associated structure in time and space, a dimension to it, bantar. This structure is fulfilled by an appropriate matching set of qualities, jantar, which has a unique sound resonance, mantar, and a distinct visual form, yantar. This form and energy interrelate to the universe, tantar, creating a projection and track as it threads through time and space, patantar, until finally achieving its liberated form, beyond time and space, sotantar. This form creates a neutral point that ties together many of the polarities inherent in Prakirti to embed and express the essence of the antar in creation. sarb ko gyan."

Every seed know there is a tree in it, whether it sprouts or not that's a matter of chance, if you tell me a woman doesn't know which man is for her, forget it, that's not true.

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